Hero also Sick

Assalammualaikum & Hi.

Heyyy guysss. It's been awhile since I last posted an entry, righttttttt? Hahaha. Since Feb hah, wowwww, lama jugak tu. Well, things got complicated this past few months. ^_^

Soooooooooo, anyway did you guys missed me?? Today, i wanna talk about heroes. Do you have one in your life? I mean, REAL HEROES? Not the supernatural one. Hehe :'D

Well, to tell a story, I actually do. Hahahahaha, today's entry is nothing special actually. It's just an entry about how i've been coping up these few days. As for what i'm saying just now about heroes. I got a hero. One and only. :) 

He's my everything and I am HIS EVERYTHING. Like, HIS one and only EVERYTHING. So, yeah! Find someone who loves you to the infinity like that people! No kidding. Hahahaha, yeah back to the story. Recently, i was shocked by a news. It's kinda heartbreaking story. Almost make me cry out my heart in public (well, actually kinda already did that. HAHAHA) That is of course because he is in a lot of pain (not really a physical pain but still a pain).☹️

I'm sad for him. I feel the pain for him. But in Islam, we call this as fated. Qada' dan Qada'r. Thus, my real writing here is actually more confusing. Me! Myself, I don't know what I really want to write. I don't know how to say the real deal here without feeling sad or cry it out. How to blurted out, "hey! my fav person is sick. Like, sick SICK that cannot be cure? Well, more to dying????" :'D

Get me??? Hahahahaha, anyway that's not....important....hmmmm.

What i really want rn is to be back at a place where i was supposed to be. Where I should really be right now. Not here. Every second i missed with that person is like a black hole of regrets. 

I want to be strong. But sometimes, it hurt just so much more and i want to cry it out. It's just i don't understand WHY i can't do that yet. Hahaha, I know that i am stronger than that, but i want a warm hug with words that can coaxed me saying that everything's gonna be okay. You'll survive. He'll survive. She'll survive. Everyone is going to be alright. There are plenty more time you guys can spend together. 

Then, there's this one inner voice saying that, "you and me both know that you are not the same anymore. Who are you trying to lie at? Are you trying to fool people with that facade? They all care, but never to understands of the situation that is happening."

To be honest? I am a broken piece of human being already. :) Fragile as a glass. Handle with care. Please????? :') 

But i know there are another person who are as broken as i am, so i'm just gonna be here and stronger for that person.

For now, i'm still laughing throughout the moment i'm living, but there is not one second that i'm not sad for him, for her, with him and with her. I know i am a better person with their supports, so i'll try my best for there rest of us.

So, wish me luck 'kay??? :) Love you guys.